Funny Holiday complaints

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The Beach was too sandy

THESE ARE ACTUAL COMPLAINTS RECEIVED BY   

 "THOMAS COOK VACATIONS" 

FROM DISSATISFIED  CUSTOMERS:

1. "On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I don't like spicy food."

2. "They should not allow topless sunbathing on the beach. It was very distracting for my husband who just wanted to relax."

3. "We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the taxi drivers as they were all Spanish."

4. "We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had to bring our own swimsuits and towels. We assumed it would be included in the price."

5. "The beach was too sandy. We had to clean everything when we returned to our room."

6. "We found the sand was not like the sand in the brochure. Your brochure shows the sand as white but it was more yellow."

7. "It's lazy of the local shopkeepers in Puerto Vallartato close in the afternoons. I often needed to buy things during 'siesta' time -- this should be banned."

8. "No-one told us there would be fish in the water. The children were scared."

9. "Although the brochure said that there was a fully equipped kitchen, there was no egg-slicer in the drawers."

10. "I think it should be explained in the brochure that the local convenience store does not sell proper biscuits like custard creams or ginger nuts."

11. "The roads were uneven and bumpy, so we could not read the local guide book during the bus ride to the resort. Because of this, we were unaware of many things that would have made our holiday more fun."

12. "It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England. It took the Americans only three hours to get home. This seems unfair."

13. "I compared the size of our one-bedroom suite to our friends' three-bedroom and ours was significantly smaller."

14. "The brochure stated: 'No hairdressers at the resort.' We're trainee hairdressers and we think they knew and made us wait longer for service."

15. "When we were in Spain, there were too many Spanish people there. The receptionist spoke Spanish, the food was Spanish. No one told us that there would be so many foreigners."

16. "We had to line up outside to catch the boat and there was no air-conditioning."

17. "It is your duty as a tour operator to advise us of noisy or unruly guests before we travel."

18. "I was bitten by a mosquito. The brochure did not mention mosquitoes."

19. "My fiancée and I requested twin-beds when we booked, but instead we were placed in a room with a king bed. We now hold you responsible and want to be re-reimbursed for the fact that I became pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked."

BE AWARE ...

THEY WALK AMONG US and THEY VOTE!

Cross fit

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Jason Grange

5 hrs · 

My Opinion on CrossFit**

I have been asked my opinion on Cross Fit so many times!! I've always kept my opinion relatively quiet (as in my experience, some cross fitters can be a sensitive / protective group) As a fitness lecturer and trainer with 15 years experience I feel it is time to finally share my opinion on the matter.
Cross Fit is NOT stupid. When lecturing students I always told them that there is no such thing as bad exercise, just badly prescribed exercise by trainers who call themselves ‘experts’. Boot camps, P90X, Cross Fit, Insanity etc have achieved almost a ‘cult’ status and brainwashed so many people its time to be honest and have a reality check. Like I said, I have nothing against these forms of exercise however, I have personally seen and helped rehabilitate many injuries suffered during the participation of these forms of exercise, and many of my friends both as physiotherapists and trainers both in the UK and here in Dubai have reported the same. Personally, I don't think the fault lies with any of these programs. The problem is with the fitness community itself. 

Unfortunately we have a very uneducated fitness field. Correct me if I am wrong, but the last time I checked, to open a Cross Fit gym only requires 1000 dollars, two days of class work, pass the exam and apply for affiliation. I am NOT for 1 minute suggesting all cross fit boxes are like that, I know there are many great ones out there, there are however, many terrible ones. Even worse than that, (away from Cross Fit) some trainers spend 500 pounds, study online, take a short multiple choice exam on line and a personal trainer certificate arrives in the post! next minute their on the gym floor! I believe that trainers should be held to a standard in education similar to a physical therapist. After all many therapists use tiny dumbbells and pink stretch bands, personal trainers utilise heavy loads and high skill level movements and most of our clients have some form of orthopedic dysfunction or health problem as do theirs.

I was taught, and still stick by a ‘golden’ rule taught to me by a world renowned coach who states that Flexibility / Posture must first be established, Stability second, Strength third and finally Power. And this is where, in my mind, many Cross Fit sessions unfortunately breaks this rule with the inclusion of power cleans, snatches, box jumps, etc., in the workout of the day. Cross Fit also fails to respect the fact that the nervous system takes way longer than the muscular system to recover. Having said all of this CrossFit is here to stay and I am actually glad more people are starting to take interest in their health and fitness. However, there is an intelligent way to prepare. After all, isn’t the purpose of exercise to get “healthy?” So if you want to participate in something like Cross Fit, ensure the coaches have adequate training and experience and get evaluated by a highly trained fitness professional and not someone who took a test on line! Once the “golden rule” of flexibility/posture, stability, strength and power has been addressed as well as nutrition and lifestyle factors, I say GO FOR IT! and become the next CrossFit Games champ!!!

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Chemical & Big Pharma make millions

Pfizer, HRT, money and women

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Could it really be this simple to make a few million Dollars from women. 

We take a view that it could be as easy as this. OH along with a massive investment from Pfizer. Regardless of any health problems.



Man no1,   Hey I have found away to make a few quid. You know all these women that complain about hot flushes when they go through the Menopause, well I have come up with a great cure and to be fair a great way to make us a fortune in the process.

Man no2,   Great, tell me more.


Man no1,   Well I spoken with a guy who said he could make a fortune from selling women a cure made from horse urine. 

Man no2,    WHAT..!!!  You can't be serious. 




Man no1,    YES, this guy said that he could get loads of horse piss, and through the clever guys in the
lab, ( worlds largest Pharmaceutical company Pfizer ) HRT, It will help with hot flushes, burning, itching and dryness of the vagina and surrounding areas after these women have had a hysterectomy. Plus we will encourage the women to take it to protect them against mood swings, brittle bones and heart attacks. I have also got a name for it, Premarin. They would wear the patch and the Estrogen goes into the body through the skin. The fact they get a boast of Estrogen will stop those hot flushes they complain about all the time. Just think of all those happy women!



Man no2,   Would that really work?  Is it safe?

Man no1,    It's really safe for the horse's as they tend to piss a lot. The more they drink the more they piss. Only thing is they need to be pregnant to make this work. There are some side effects. Some women will experience heavy bleeding, vaginal yeast infections, heavy periods, cramping of the legs and spotting. HRT can increase heart disease rates, particularly in women heterozygous for the V Leiden or Prothrombin gene mutations ( 11% of the Caucasian population ) The risks of HRT, beyond elevation of triglycerides, and increased risk of venous thrombosis involve cancer of the breast, endometrium and ovaries. It can increase the risk of endometrial cancer, stroke, blood clots, and possibly dementia. Premarin cream is only used vaginal burning, dryness and itching.

Man no2,    What do you do with all those fouls?





Man no1,    Well I don't care as we will make so much money from this that as far as I am concerned the farmers can just kill them. ( In 2003/2004 their were as many as 3000 PMU farms housing as many as 40'000 mares churning out thousands of gallons of estrogen-rich urine ) In 2012 these farms hold far less horses at approximately 22 farms holding as little as 800/900 pregnant mares. The farmer will keep the fouls as long as they are mares. Do you realise that we will not make thousands but millions. In fact in 2011 Pfizer made in excess of a billion dollars from HRT, and show no signs of slowing down, stopping or getting out of the HRT market.




Man no2,  But hold on, if I understand you correctly. We give the HRT to women who may have hot flushes, who may have a risk of heart disease but by giving these women HRT they may get worse things happening to them like breast cancer, heart attacks and other related problems.

Man no1,  YES of course, but just think of all that lovely money we can make!


Man no2,  But what happens if they start to die or even start to sue us over the problems they get?



Man no1, DON'T WORRY, we will make so much money from selling the HRT and if a few women die or a few women dare to sue us, who cares, they won't be around long enough to win any case against us.

We will be quids in as the British say.





References taken in part from:  http://www.equinevoices.org/horses/issues/premarin/premarin-news/
http://www.jewishhospitalcincinnati.com/cholesterol/Research/hormone_replacement.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Premarin
http://www.examiner.com/article/use-of-horse-urine-hormone-replacement-therapy-raises-risk-of-breast-cancer


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formaldehyde and formic acid

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Going out tonight ? What will you drink? 
Hangover, tips to consider; 

1, Alcohol or ethanol is metabolised in the body to acetaldehyde by and enzyme called alcohol dehydrogenase (ADH), which is highly toxic and makes us feel drunk, acetaldehyde is then metabolised to acetic acid by acetaldehyde dehydrogenase (ALDH) another enzyme. ADH and ALDH come in different iso-forms in different people which explains how some people get drunk quicker than others. If you have fast acting ADH and slow acting ALDH then you will get drunker and stay drunk longer than someone with slow acting ADH and fast acting ALDH. Those with slow acting enzymes fear not a far more powerful substance can metabolise alcohol and its called glutathione, before a couple of days before you go out and the night you go out take your glutathione supplements.

2, Ethanol suppresses vasopressin which regulates the bodies retention of water, explaining why you need to go to the toilet more once drunk. Lose water you lose electrolytes thus you need to replace once you return from your adventure with ethanol. Best option is to replace electrolytes in a solution with water. Drinking water without electrolytes will further dilute your electrolytes in the body. Electrolytes are compounds that are conductive to perform important and vital to life tasks in the body.



3, Either drink congener free alcohol, why? Congeners are slowly metabolised thus contribute to hangovers. Congeners are found in dark drinks such as whisky, rum, brandy and even red wine (however in red wine it is a good thing, stay tuned). This is how it works;

Methanol is a congener, its metabolites (formaldehyde and formic acid) extremely toxic and has been known to cause death. Methanol is metabolised the exact same way as ethanol however ethanol is preferred when both toxins are in the body thus leaving high amounts of methanol and its metabolites when ethanol has been eliminated, the next morning this is what makes you feel rotten, the high amounts of methanol and its metabolites. The key tip to beat a hangover in the morning if consuming congeners is the next morning to consume more ethanol but not congeners, why methanol poisoning in hospitals is treated with large doses of ethanol which causes the slow metabolism of of methanol which prevents the sudden build up of the highly toxic metabolites. This is commonly known as the 'hair of the dog' and why vodka (my favourite drink) yields little hangover effects if you replace electrolytes of course. Though one could just drink alcohol without congeners for an easier time.

Back to red wine the congeners are actually polyphenols like resveratrol help to counteract the damage that is done to the brains hippocampus. Good news for red wine drinkers.



4, I do not agree with the use of drugs long terms but do for short terms. High levels of prostaglandins. The special nerve endings that sense pain are extremely sensitive to this chemical. Hangovers have been associated with high prostaglandins, best option is to take a prostaglandin inhibitor like aspirin (ensure it is caffeine free and you are medically fit to take it).

In conclusion;

- Take glutathione supplements leading up to and on the night of drinking
- Drink either congeners free alcohol or red wine for an easy hangover
- If you do drink congeners then prepare an ethanol drink in the morning
- Drink Electrolyte and water solution all day
- Take 2 aspirin upon returning home and in the morning

(please check drug and supplement interactions and that you are medically fit to take aspirin before taking any medications)

If you liked this little post I will be bringing biochemistry and lab testing education to the UK in 2014. Please visit and like this page for more information;

www.facebook.com/gorebioscience  

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